Lawyers, Guns and Money

Lawyers, Guns and Money
by Warren Zevon

Good Friday

Once again, it’s Fun-Time Friday. That may sound absurd, given the circumstances, but it’s no more implausible than calling today “Good” Friday, is it? Of course, through God’s redemptive power, He is able to take this darkest of days and bend it to the good, turning this Easter weekend into the most important and hopeful time for the whole human race.

Today’s song is from that “excitable boy” Warren Zevon, who died in 2003 after a battle with lung cancer. Shortly before his death, Mr Zevon filled in for an extended period for Paul Shaefer as the bandleader on Late Night with David Letterman. The bulk of his earlier career was spent as a composer of catchy, sometimes profound, and always quirky songs, such as Werewolves of London and – perhaps apropos of today, as well – Accidentally, Like a Martyr.

Lawyers, Guns and Money is a story of deals gone south and best laid plans gone awry . It begins with a case of mistaken identity and its serious consequences:

I went home with the waitress
The way I always do
How was I to know
She was with the Russians, too?

Sound familiar? Let’s pick up the Gospel story early this Good Friday morning:

While Peter was below in the courtyard, one of the servant girls of the high priest came by. When she saw Peter warming himself, she looked closely at him. “You also were with that Nazarene, Jesus,” she said. But he denied it. “I don't know or understand what you're talking about,” he said, and went out into the entryway. When the servant girl saw him there, she said again to those standing around, “This fellow is one of them.” Again he denied it. After a little while, those standing near said to Peter, “Surely you are one of them, for you are a Galilean.” He began to call down curses, and he swore to them, “I don't know this man you're talking about.” Immediately the rooster crowed the second time. Then Peter remembered the word Jesus had spoken to him: “Before the rooster crows twice you will disown me three times.” And he broke down and wept.
– Mark 14:66-72

Meanwhile, Jesus is being beaten and mocked by the Roman soldiers. They have thrust a crown of thorns on His head, put a “royal” robe on Him and given Him a reed sceptre, while throwing dice to see who will get to keep His garments:

I was gambling in Havana
I took a little risk
Send lawyers, guns and money
Dad, get me out of this

Jesus had already called on his own Dad, last night in the garden, when he said, “Abba, Father, everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will (Mark 14:36).” But from that moment forward, Jesus set His face toward Golgotha. He will endure unbelievably brutal beatings and blows, so much so that the soldiers will have to conscript the help of someone on the street to help Jesus carry the cross to Calvary: “A certain man from Cyrene, Simon, the father of Alexander and Rufus, was passing by on his way in from the country, and they forced him to carry the cross (Mark 15:21).”

I'm the innocent bystander
Somehow I got stuck
Between the rock
and a hard place
And I'm down on my luck
Yes, I'm down on my luck
Well, I'm down on my luck

We have already seen Peter, the “Rock”, crumbling under pressure and denying his Lord. The rest of the disciples also scattered, fearing for their lives:

I'm hiding in Honduras
I'm a desperate man
Send lawyers, guns and money . . .

But Jesus stood before the tribunals and rulers, engaging them with the most important questions they would ever ask:

Very early in the morning, the chief priests, with the elders, the teachers of the law and the whole Sanhedrin, reached a decision. They bound Jesus, led him away and handed him over to Pilate. “Are you the king of the Jews?” asked Pilate. “You have said so,” Jesus replied. The chief priests accused him of many things. So again Pilate asked him, “Aren't you going to answer? See how many things they are accusing you of.” But Jesus still made no reply, and Pilate was amazed.
– Mark 15:1-5

[Pilate] went back inside the palace. “Where do you come from?” he asked Jesus, but Jesus gave him no answer. “Do you refuse to speak to me?” Pilate said. “Don't you realize I have power either to free you or to crucify you?” Jesus answered, “You would have no power over me if it were not given to you from above. Therefore the one who handed me over to you is guilty of a greater sin.” From then on, Pilate tried to set Jesus free . . .
– John 19:9-12

Lawyers, guns and money . . .

Pilate and the Chief Priests did their own lawyerly battling, with this bit of wordsmithing:

Pilate had a notice prepared and fastened to the cross. It read: JESUS OF NAZARETH, THE KING OF THE JEWS. Many of the Jews read this sign, for the place where Jesus was crucified was near the city, and the sign was written in Aramaic, Latin and Greek. The chief priests of the Jews protested to Pilate, "Do not write 'The King of the Jews,' but that this man claimed to be king of the Jews." Pilate answered, "What I have written, I have written."
– John 19:19-21

And the “big guns” of the day, the Roman soldiers, had already thrown their weight around. But after they had scourged, mocked and beaten Jesus, at least some of them at last got it right:

And when Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, he gave up his spirit. At that moment the curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. The earth shook, the rocks split and the tombs broke open. The bodies of many holy people who had died were raised to life. They came out of the tombs after Jesus' resurrection and went into the holy city and appeared to many people. When the centurion and those with him who were guarding Jesus saw the earthquake and all that had happened, they were terrified, and exclaimed, "Surely he was the Son of God!"
– Matthew 27:50-54

And then there was the money. Perhaps Jesus’ rhetorical question from earlier in His ministry, “What good is it for you to gain the whole world, yet forfeit your soul? (Mark 8:36)” was ringing in Judas’ ears that morning of Good Friday:

When Judas, who had betrayed him, saw that Jesus was condemned, he was seized with remorse and returned the thirty pieces of silver to the chief priests and the elders. "I have sinned," he said, "for I have betrayed innocent blood." "What is that to us?" they replied. "That's your responsibility." So Judas threw the money into the temple and left. Then he went away and hanged himself.
– Matthew 27:3-5

Jesus calls on His “Abba” – his Dad – one last time, in His last words from the Cross: “Jesus called out with a loud voice, ‘Father, into your hands I commit my spirit.’ When he had said this, he breathed his last (Luke 23:46).” I heard it explained once that that phrase was an ancient Hebrew children’s bedtime prayer, much as we might today say, “Now I lay me down to sleep.” Here is the Lamb of God, slain for the sins of the whole world, completely trusting His heavenly Father for what comes next.

Like the old adage, “You can’t judge a book by its cover,” we often aren’t able to grasp the whole meaning of a situation by just taking it at face value. Mr Zevon seems to echo this thought in another of his songs:

I saw a werewolf drinking a Piña Colada at Trader Vic’s
and his hair was "perfect".

Remembering the details of this day, we may marvel at how anyone could call it “Good” Friday. But in just a couple of sunrises, by that glorious Easter morning, we’ll be able to look back and see just how “good” – if not “perfect” – today really was.